As a coach, one often feels alone and isolated. I have been in this field longer than most, since 1990. I did not call it coaching then, the term had not yet been coined as it applied to personal and professional development.
The isolation comes from working by yourself. Don’t get me wrong – I love what I do and why I do it. I see the rewards everyday when I witness the shifts occurring in my clients and I seeing them moving forward with their lives. The aloneness is more one of lack of collegiality.
Recently however I found the Montreal coaches network and, for the second time this past Friday, I attended the morning breakfast. There I met others, who like myself, are coaches, each with their own speciality and unique approach. What truly inspired me is that the group is there to collaborate and support one another – there is no competition.
In addition to finding this community, each month features a guest speaker. This month Kurt Shuster from Vancouver spoke in regard to Positive Psychology.
What is Positive Psychology – the study of human flourishing, the science of happiness. Positive Psychology, as I learned, is the science that validates what I do, that coaching clients through the Law of Attraction and helping them shift to a positive versus negative world view can be proven empirically to change a person’s life.
Now I always knew that yet somehow when someone says to me that they can prove that what I do makes a difference, it makes my work seem more legitimate. Perhaps that is the old scientifically based physiotherapist who resides in my body.
As an example, Kurt talked about the research on approach versus avoidance goals. An approach goal would state something like, I want to be on time for all my meetings, where as an avoidance goal would state, I don’t want to be late. The approach goal students who participated in this study were, as you can imagine, more successful
This idea is also fundamental to the Law Of Attraction which states that you must be clear on what you want rather than stating what you don’t what. Whatever you give your focus to will manifest. It matters.
Next Kurt presented the four pillars of Well-Being: positive emotions, character, engagement and meaning, and positive relationships. While we did not have time to discuss all of these in detail, you can see that the relationship between the pillars and how you choose to live in the world. In the end, it always come back to you and I. We are responsible for our own happiness and it is within our power to be happy or not. Happiness is not based on some magic bullet that lies outside of us.
An additional piece of research regarding Character, Strengths and Virtues (Christopher Peterson et al) examined the qualities that are associated with a strong sense of well-being. The research found that, across cultures, the five strengths associated with Well-Being are hope, gratitude, curiosity, zest, and the capacity to love and be loved. In addition, their research showed that the 2 strengths associated with work satisfaction are hope and zest (passion, excitement and energy).
You can take the VIA strengths assessment to evaluate your strengths at www.viacharacter.org and visit the science of coaching blog at www.blog.noomii.com if all of this interests you.
This is only a brief summary of Kurt’s lecture – there was much more. I share it with you as I felt uplifted by the presentation, connected with a community of coaches, and validated for the work I choose to do. It is clear that each of us needs support, whether you are the coach or the coachee, and that support, if well chosen, lifts our spirits and helps us in taking on the world in a positive way.
Have an attitude of gratitude and see how this influences your life.
Until next time…
Betty
